No Tennis Shoes

Today the youngest graduates from pre high school.  The dress code for this occasion carries a serious mandate, repeated often via scary bulletins sent home and lengthy recorded messages:   No. Tennis.  Shoes.  In case you missed that:  No. Tennis.  Shoes.  Don't even think about it.  When it comes to appropriate graduate footwear, a pair of Vans could undue years of hard work in an instant.  "Anyone caught wearing tennis shoes to graduation will not be allowed to participate in the ceremony!"  So sayeth the sternest assistant principal on the planet.  This guy means business. 

Nine years of listening to his warnings about clearing out your locker and what will happen, in addition to the public flogging in the senior quad, if you land on the no-activities list.  Nine years and I still get nervous, as if I've committed a no-no.  His voice triggers all kinds of inner tumult left over from my youth.  He knows what I've been up to, he knows about the times I dropped the good girl mask, the times I went mishuga.  He knows.  How does he know?  He just does.  I'll miss nine years of his creepy voicemails about as much as I'll miss the late-night party boys next door when they move out, God willing, some glorious day in the future. 

And so, in celebration of my son's graduation, I may wear sneakers myself, just to mess with this dude's over-developed sense of authority.  No reason why comfy tennies can't  complete my look tonight.  No reason other than flats do me no favors in the height department.  It's hard to pull off the illusion of lankiness when you only reach the belly button of most adults in the immediate vicinity.  I like to look people in the eye, not the pipic, so I'll just have to see what feels right.  Someone whose opinion I relish more than anyone's recently informed me, in her typically blunt style, that no one gives a @#$% about what I wear to my son's graduation.  Well.  Don't try to sugarcoat it.  What do you really think?  I think I'll wear my son's Vans.  They won't fit, but they'll send an important message to you-know-who.  A message that says:  We're done here.