Last night I dreamed I had a big fight with Kim Kardashian. I couldn't figure out how to turn on the oven and she refused to help me. I kept saying, "Come on, Kim, just show me," and she kept saying, "Touch it and die." I woke up very agitated and questioning my sanity. Is my oven haunted? I didn't even know KK likes to cook.
Sincerely,
Heated
Dear Heated,
You don't get a tuchus like that without stepping foot in the kitchen. Trust me on this. Your dream can be interpreted on several levels. Mainly, it means Kim Kardashian is after your recipe for kugel. She'll stop at nothing to get it. Lock your doors. Hire a bodyguard. Stash the recipe in the safety deposit box. Watch your ass. And definitely, get a new oven.
You're welcome,
The SJG
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