So many months, I had so much to worry about, so much to obsess and lose sleep over, and then the worst of the worst happened, and now everything pales in comparison. I've become alarmingly philosophical. Lately, I just give a shrug and say, "oh well." When the broker tells me there might be a mold situation at my dad's condo, I tell him it could be worse. What is wrong me? Why so sanguine, so accepting? This me is a very different SJG. I'm all "whatever, it'll work out." It's a little bit disturbing. Neighbors stop me on the street. They ask if I'm okay. The other day, Joe came out of his house and stared at me for three whole minutes before pondering my whereabouts. "Excuse me, ma'am, have you seen my friend Carol? She's short and a lot less relaxed than you. Always fretting about something. Everyone on the block is worried about her." "No need to worry. It's me, silly. This is just the more together me. And I've asked you never to call me ma'am. I prefer Your Royal Jewess." "I like the less together you better." I did my best to reassure him. "I'm sure she'll be back soon. This is just a phase." "When you see her, tell her I miss her. She's more fun to tease."
It's the inevitable change in demeanor that comes from ascending from princess to queen of the family. All you have to do is perfect the wave and the facial expression appropriate to Kurt Vonnegutt's "Hi, Ho." But be careful not to slip into the verbal "Whatever...", since such an utterance can get you fired by those disloyal to the Queen.
I write TV movies, plays, and humor blogs. I've got two menschy sons, a wonderful French daughter-in-law, two angel grandkids, a longtime hubby, and a Royal Rescue Pup of Questionable Lineage.
It's the inevitable change in demeanor that comes from ascending from princess to queen of the family. All you have to do is perfect the wave and the facial expression appropriate to Kurt Vonnegutt's "Hi, Ho." But be careful not to slip into the verbal "Whatever...", since such an utterance can get you fired by those disloyal to the Queen.
ReplyDeleteWonderful royal advice. I will knight you immediately if not sooner.
ReplyDeleteI can help you with the wave and facial expression...and will love you regardless!
ReplyDeleteHang in there
E!
Thank you, E! Lessons of any kind are always appreciated.
ReplyDelete