To Binge, Or Not To Binge

Just the word makes me feel bad about myself.  Binge.  I'm not much of a binger.  More of a snacker.  A little cookie, okay, maybe one more, and uh oh, the pants are too tight.  I'm the same way when it comes to my TV consumption. A show here, a show there, and uh oh, I'm in it till the programming gods cancel the series. I don't identify with the current trend of binge-watching.  I did it once, I admit it.  Binge-watched the first season of "Homeland." But that was only because I was sick.  I have friends who've binge-watched "Breaking Bad" and never recovered. They're still wandering the streets of Albuquerque, looking for "the blue stuff." Gee, I miss them.  I really do. I sure hope I see them again some day. They were nice.

And so, on principle, I pretty much refuse to binge-watch anything. Even.... "House of Cards."  I'll be honest with you. I watched the first eppie.  I was all, "Yeah, okay, whatever." It felt a little too self-consciously dark and aren't-we-the-hippest-show-ever. A little too self-aware of its edginess. Of course, the rest of my mishpocha sorely disagreed. They tried to do a "House of Cards" reverse intervention on the SJG. They tried to get me hooked on it. I resisted. The SJG can't be forced to watch just anything.  But then, my people know that already. What were they thinking?  How many times have they said, "Mom, watch this game with us," only to have me wander out of the room, in search of something I can actually comprehend. Like "Project Runway" or "Seinfeld" repeats.

Fine, I'll watch, I'll watch. Quit staring at me, Kevin.

But back to "House of Cards." I refused to play that hand... see what I did there?... until last night.  I blame the Olympics. I'm so done with it. Done, I tell ya. I looked at hubby. "Okay, okay, I'll try it, but you'll have to give me frequent recaps." I knew in advance this wouldn't work. It would be like that time he offered to teach me how to ski, gave up in about a minute, and hired an instructor.  The first episode of "House of Cards" (Season 2) started, and so did the questions. "Who's that?" "I think that's so-and-so." "What do you mean, you think?"  "I haven't seen it a long time." "I need answers!" Well, it was like that for two episodes, hubby sort of filling in the blanks, me bombarding him with questions.  Didn't matter, though. Later, I binged on recaps I found online, including a four-minute video that summed up the entire first season. I'm up to speed on "House of Cards." I'm now the one explaining all the plot points hubby forgot. Who has the upper hand now? Why, the SJG, of course.  And let's keep it that way, shall we?