A Short Jewish Gal Walks Into...

A short Jewish gal walks into a bar.  "Ouch!" she says. "That's gonna leave a bruise."

An onion bagel and a slice of lox walk into a bar.  The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve food here."

A short Jewish gal walks in a bar after a long day of worrying over nothing and orders a drink. After her first sip, she hears a high-pitched voice.

"Hey, lady! Nice pants!"

The SJG looks around, doesn't see anyone, and shrugs it off.  After a little bit, she takes another sip and hears the voice again.

"Hey, lady! Sweet shoes!"

Again, she looks around, sees no one but the bartender helping other customers.  She shakes her head and sips once more.

"Hey, lady!  Cool shirt!"

She puts her drink down and signals to Moishe the bartender, who comes over.

"Nu?" Moishe says.

"What is that high-pitched voice I keep hearing?"

"Oh, those are the peanuts.  They're complimentary."