It's Important To Look Lovely

Between being a caregiver-referree, a Life Alert call-reciever, a nighttime Xanax-taker, and an award-winning worrier, the SJG doesn't have much time for an elaborate beauty regimen, so what she does has to count for something. We sat down with the oft-exhausted blogger and miraculously-employed TV movie writer to discuss her daily routine, if you can call it that, which, just between us, is being generous.

"Well, my philosophy is really quite simple. It's important to look lovely, no matter the occasion. Even as recently as Saturday morning, around 4 a.m., I put on a little lipstick, a dab of concealer, a bucket of foundation, and a schmear of blush, before jumping in my car to get to Cedars. Why scare the nice people in the ER?  They deal with enough trauma already. I don't want to add to it by showing up looking like ka-ka. After all, the doctors and nurses are the ones who've been up all night. Until about 3:30 a.m., I was fast asleep."

Whether she's rushing to the emergency room, or heading out for an Important Hollywood Meeting, the SJG likes to wash her punim in imported water from the Dead Sea.  "I won't lie, it stings a little, but boy does it exfoliate like a mutha-eff'r. Once the top layer of my skin peels off, and the paramedics leave, I put on some nice moisturizer. They vary, depending on how many free samples I can get out of the Sephora gals.  Next I do a refrigerator-based eye cream and lip balm --  I find I Can't Believe It's Not Butter works wonders.  For makeup, I try to use anything that's not been sitting in the drawer more than five years.  If the tube has developed crust, it's not good.  Then I blush and bronze, I microwave and blend, and I'm good to go."

The SJG offered us a final beauty tip before hurrying off to the pharmacy to stare at elderly-inspired products she never thought she'd be buying, but what can she do, these challenging life moments tend to show up like an unwanted visitor from the Planet Poop. "Go to bed early, wake up looking the same, but maybe if you're lucky a little bit rested, which couldn't hurt."