Coming To A Theater Near You

"If you give me my clock back now, that'll be the end of it. But 

if you don't, I  will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you."

Oh, joy. Oh, wonder. Is that another hour of sleep you've just offered me? Why thank you, Time Change Enforcers, soon to be a major motion picture starring Liam Neeson.  The basic premise: "Change your clocks, or die, mutha-effer's!" And yet, if I've just gained an hour--as opposed to another pound, thanks to the elegant dinner party I attended last night in honor of the wonderful birthday boychick Dan, an event involving many courses and wines and smuggled truffles and a large array of silver, which caused great confusion between myself and my cuzzy Andy, the birthday boychick today, a la, "Which fork do we use?" "Whichever fork Libby is using"--why do I feel as though I've lost an hour? Why? Why? Maybe because the dog named Dusty, renamed Coney for his endless need for the collar of shame, doesn't give a bark about time changes. The elderly pup wakes up at 5:30 a.m. anyway. Good thing I've got hubby trained for early morning dog duty. And yet, I still suffer from sleep deprivation, even though I don't leave the bed. The clock giveth, and the clock taketh away. Feel free to quote me. Now, if you don't mind, excuse me while I go back to sleep, in search of that extra hour.