Hubby has generously allowed me to list some of his favorite rants. The following five items should be illegal, are already illegal but lazily enforced, or may become illegal.
1. Reckless Use of Windshield Wiper Fluid
"People who use their windshield wiping fluid while stopped at a stop sign are completely oblivious to the fact that the windows of people behind them are getting filthy from the spray onto their clean car. It should be illegal." (The SJG is guilty of this crime. Feel free to make a citizen's arrest.)
2. Gross Negligence of the Express Line
"How difficult is it to have your payment method ready to go when you're standing in the 10 items or less line at the market? The whole point of the line is to get in and get out quickly. It defeats the whole purpose if you take 10 eff'n minutes to find your wallet. It should be illegal." (The SJG would never stoop this low. I'm always ready to spend.)
3. Turn Signal Denial
"Radical lane changes without any warning can kill people. Don't make me guess what you're about to do. How hard is it to use your turn signal? It's already illegal but no one seems to care." (The SJG is a big proponent of the turn signal. Sometimes I use it when I'm not changing lanes, just to 'eff with folks.)
4. Commercial Volume Abuse
"The wild volume differential between show content and commercials is about to become illegal. They've passed a law to level the loudness between the two, but it hasn't gone into effect yet." (The SJG hates this volume abuse even more than hubby. I'm throwing a very quiet party when it becomes reality. You're all invited.)
5. Reservation Cluster #$%*
"To accept a reservation at a popular restaurant, and then ignore it, making you wait anywhere between half an hour to 45 five minutes is the worst offense of all. Dinner should be free if they make you wait that long. The whole point of a reservation is to reserve a time. If you can't control the table turnover, your restaurant skills are questionable. It should be illegal to make people wait." (This is hubby's number one pet peeve. The SJG is happy to sit at the bar and judge people as they walk by.)
Sunday, November 7, 2010
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