The Shanda Of It All

"Hi, Manny. This is the SJG. I'd like a refund on that 'Cadillac of briskets' you sold me. It was more like a Yugo. A lemon. A letdown. The brisket wasn't tender, Manny. It wasn't even semi-tender. It pains me to say it out loud, Manny, but the brisket was tough. Sure, my family said it was still delicious. If that's not faint praise, what is? The shanda of it all. One bite in, Not-So-Great Uncle Seymour lost a tooth. A tooth, Manny! An incisor, yet! He's sending me the dental bill, which I will then forward to you. So, as for that Yelp review you wanted me to write, here it is. How do you like it so far, Manny?"