SJG Palatial Shake-Up!

Kissy Von Kreplach's resignation letter was a little harsh.

(Sherman Oaks) Can you say Shandalabra! We've just learned, only moments ago, that the SJG's trusted aide, Kissy Von Kreplach, has... brace yourself... skidaddled, leaving only a resignation letter that seemed a little harsh: "I can't stand it another second. I'm out." MENSCH MAGAZINE has it on pretty good authority that Hanukkah was the last candle for Von Kreplach. According to a person who just knows stuff, Kissy -- aka Kissy-Face to her close friends -- reached her tipping pointing after the SJG's Faux Festival of Lights. "Kissy comes from a mispocha that embraces the menorah. Every night, a new candle. Every night, a little gift and a big one at the end. But the SJG only lit one candle on the first night, couldn't even get through the blessing without Googling, and then didn't light the candles until the last night, only because she was guilted into it by her eldest son, who wept a little at the sight of the candle-free menorah. Oh, and please, let's not even get into the frozen faux latkes she served. And gifts? What gifts? Everyone got bupkis, unless you count the feeble attempt to pass off running shoes bought on Cyber Monday as 'eight nights of gifts rolled into one.' No one bought it, especially Kissy-Face, who was given a pair a size-and-a-half too big." 

Kissy Von Kreplach would do anything to get away.

Even before Hanukkah, Von Kreplach had worked up her exit strategy, involving a luxury excursion to outer space. "She always wanted to visit Mars and Jupiter, and now, thanks to a stylish new line of fashion-forward, fiberglass space wear, she can travel the solar system in style." Despite the fact that Von Kreplach's job was a temporary 10-year position, the SJG is reportedly devastated. "Good luck finding a replacement for Kissy-Face," said another poorly-placed source. "She's one of a kind." MENSCH anticipates that the internationally-acclaimed blogger may have to go it alone from now on, given her reputation. Yet in the long-run, this may be a good thing. It will give her something new to kvetch about in her beloved, award-winning blog.