The Request

Miriam, an elderly lady, is on her way to the Glendale Galleria when she hears music coming from close by. Standing there on the corner is a street musician playing the violin. So she joins the small crowd listening to the music. Suddenly, a flasher comes up to the crowd, opens his coat and bares his all. With a totally straight face, Miriam turns to the musician and says, "How much do you want for playing 'Button Up Your Overcoat?’ "

One day, just as Rebecca was walking past Yiddishe Mama Exclusive Fashions on Fairfax, she saw them putting a new dress in their window. It stopped her in her tracks – it was a pale green Dior evening dress and she was totally entranced by this brilliant creation. She was convinced that it was bashert (destined by fate) – meant for her.  But it was priced at $6,500 and she had to think of a good way to persuade her Hymie to buy it for her. Then she had an idea. She couldn’t wait to get home.
"Hymie, darling?"
"Yes, what is it Rebecca?"
"Last night I had a lovely dream, Hymie."
"So what kind of a dream was it, Rebecca?"
"I dreamed that we passed by Yiddishe Mama, and in the window was this gorgeous Dior dress for only $6,500. And do you know what you did, Hymie?"
"Nu, so what did I do?"
"You went into the shop and bought it for me, darling."
"Did I really?" Hymie said. "That really was a wonderful dream. Please God, in all your future dreams, you should wear it in good health."

Bernie and Shlomo, both in their 80s, are sitting together in the park.
"So, Shlomo, how are you?" Bernie asks.
"Oy vey, I’m getting worse and worse," Shlomo says. "All of a sudden, my memory's decided to play tricks on me. I can't even remember whether it was you or my brother who died last month."
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