Small Town Withdrawal

Ladybird Diner, Lawrence

(Sherman Oaks) The blog must go on. A case of jet lag, an inexplicable urge to yell, "Go Royals!" and free-floating confusion jeopardized the Short Jewish Gal's ability to write her blog this morning.  There were reports that her aging pup named Dusty might step in and lend a paw, but then he heard about her love of Lucy the Spaniel from Lawrence, and refused to help. Then her concierge allergist, who lives two blocks away, stopped by for $250 an hour, and diagnosed her with a rare form of STW. "She's got Small Town Withdrawal," the doctor said. "A minute ago, she couldn't stop talking about the ease of finding a parking spot, the restaurants where you never wait more than five minutes, and that cute diner with the cheesy grits. To shut her up, I gave her a nice big shot of something wonderful and told her to stay away from pollen. She's fine now, I think, but with her, you never know. Just don't ask her about the artisan Oktoberfest beer she had the other night. She might go over the edge and never come back." After her doctor left, the SJG stood on her imaginary front perch, and babbled incoherently about blueberry pie.

Don't worry, I didn't eat the bacon.