Oscar Party Controversy

Last night's winning Oscar Party controversy happened mid-way through the show, or maybe it was three-quarters of the way through (there's no way of knowing, what with all the pausing of the remote control) as rumors swirled that the SJG had swallowed a piece of decorative gold foil. Why would I do that? Did I do that? I say no, but then, everyone else at the party, the people who love me the most, all agreed that I was just the sort of absentminded gal to swallow a piece of decorative gold foil, especially when faced with a heavenly assortment of miniature desserts by Cousin Amy, gourmet caterer to the stars. Dainty cups of chocolate and peanut butter swirl. Salted caramel in petite, chocolate-dipped golden foil cones. Naturally, I sampled all the yumminess. It was in my contract: "The SJG shall eat whatever you put in front of her, particularly in the award-winning dessert category." So, yes, yes, I ate the salted caramel in the golden cone. Or, according to my sons, "Christ, Ma, you scarfed that down like a piranha." But did I eat the foil, too? Was I that enraptured with said dollop of divinity that I forgot to discard the Teeny Cone of Shame? I wish I could tell you. Only my digestive track knows for sure. And my adoring family.