Saturday, December 7, 2019

The Boss of Me

Dear SJG,
What are the benefits and disadvantages of being self-employed?
Thanks,
Asking For A Friend
Dear Asking,
I've been "self-employed" since I popped out in the backseat of my daddy's Oldsmobile. I had to support the entire family. I really don't like to discuss it. But I will discuss this. The benefits of self-employment are huge. You get to parade around in your schlepwear all day. You can make coffee the way you like it - hot, like that rumored temper of yours. You don't have to worry about anyone stealing your sandwich, unless your spouse steals it and takes it to work, which in some area codes is grounds for divorce. You're your own boss, so you can be as bitchy as you want and make up your own rules. And break them. You don't have to get nervous when you interview yourself. Plus, you get to avoid other humans. But don't get too excited. There are a few downsides, too. You have to deal with that huffy, hormonally-challenged boss. You spend a lot of time looking for work that may be sporadic at best, meaning, pay and medical benefits can be iffy. You may get tired of yourself. But then you can take a nap. So that's another win.
You're Welcome,
The SJG

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