Monday, September 6, 2010

Daddy Gets Kicked Off the Soccer Field

My fans have spoken, and only four bothered to vote for the "Pick me, choose me, love me" blog contest.  Am I hurt?  Am I bitter?  Oh, hell yes.  The fact that two voters happen to be closely related to the SJG shows the sort of worldwide domination I sorely lack.  This one goes out to my cuzzy, Andy. 

This morning, hubby sat down in my office for an exclusive one-on-one interview.  "Which incident would you prefer?  When Scotty first began playing soccer, or when he was on a club team?"  "Which one was more humiliating for me?"  "It must've been the local park, where people know you."  "That sounds right. Proceed."  "It was 8 o'clock on a Saturday morning and five minutes into the game, it was clear that one kid on the other team had mad skills."  "How old was Scotty?"  "He was eight or nine."  "Go on."  "The assistant coach was in charge and he had no clue how to teach the game of soccer.  He wasn't giving the kids any direction.  They were just running around like fools.  I walked up to the guy and suggested nicely that he explain to the kids that the person with the ball should be surrounded and should try to take the ball away from the good player.  I also said if I wanted my son to get exercise and run around, he could've just gone on the jogging path." 

"Oh, honey, it's all coming back to me now."  "So the assistant coach clearly wanted no input and walked up to me and literally shoved me.  I couldn't believe it.  I was actually surprised that he took offense." "Well, he was in the middle of a game."  "That's no excuse.  He wasn't doing his job as a 'coach.'"  "Then what happened?"  "I never raised a hand to him, but my volume level did go up.  You could hear me in Oxnard.  It became a screaming match and I walked away."  "And then you got kicked off?"  "I was told to leave by one of the officials."  "Did anyone back you up?  I know I didn't, I was too busy hiding my face."  "Other than you, the other parents weren't even awake."  "And that was it?  No repercussions?"  " Someone did call from the league, telling me not to go back for a week and I said, 'gladly.'"

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