The Oy Vey Dial

There's the Drunk Dial.  There's the Butt Dial.  And now, direct from Sherman Oaks, there's the Oy Vey Dial. What is the Oy Vey Dial? I'm so glad you asked. You know how I hate to dole out unwanted info. The Oy Vey Dial is something the SJG is famous for committing. The Oy Vey Dial is inspired, not by booze, not by iPhone, but by worry and panic and conclusion-jumping.  Worry, panic and conclusion-jumping:  a lethal combo platter.  Step away from this combo, people, and order something less anxiety-producing. Order a nice scoop of wait-and-see, a side dish of WebMD-doesn't-make-you-a-doctor, an extra helping of calm-the-eff-down.  Take a page from Joe Friday.  Just the facts, ma'am. Not the speculation.  Not the scary assumptions.  Just the facts. Otherwise, and I say this with authority, you will make the Oy Vey Dial and regret it.  You will realize later, hmm, maybe I shouldn't have called so-and-so. Maybe I shouldn't have conveyed that doomsday message. Maybe I should've taken a deep breath and counted to 10 before spreading tsouris throughout the Westside and parts of North Carolina. Maybe next time, and believe me, there will be a next time, I'll think twice before I overreact. Maybe.  Then again, what if my Oy Vey is justified?