Unreality Show Axed!

"If your life was a reality TV show, would you watch it?"

VH-1 has rudely axed the reality show starring the SJG. Last July, the network debuted the eight-episode series, "The SJG: Her Story," which gave her blog fans a glimpse into her non-celebrity life, not to mention, the opportunity to cut through the endless tabloid fodder. 

Certain headlines were harder to disprove than others.  "SJG SPENDS LAST NIGHT WORRYING." Hard to refute, due to its factual nature. "SJG SPROUTS EXTRA THUMB." Much easier to dispute, considering she got rid of the extra thumb before hitting puberty. "Let's just say the extra thumb thing may have earned me 'freak' status on the playground, but did nothing for my social life," she told Variety before the show premiered.  

"We pulled the plug because the SJG refused to cooperate with some of our planned stunts," a VH-1 spokesman said. "She said no to streaking Ventura Boulevard, which we thought would've been both hilarious and alarming to drivers and pedestrians in the immediate vicinity. Her thumb's down (see what we did there?) was the final straw. But we wish her well in her pursuit of whatever the hell she's trying to do these days. Listen, we gave her a shot at fame and fortune and she blew it. All she wanted to do was kvetch and eat kugel, which, just between us, doesn't make for interesting TV."