Something Like This

And now a short lesson on willpower, short because I'm running low on it these days. What is it and how do I get me some? I decided to call up an old shrink, or as she prefers, Former Shrink, to ask her opinion. The conversation went something like this:
FS: "Not that again."
SJG: "What do you mean... again?"
FS: "We spent four years on the willpower thing."
SJG: "We did not."
FS:  "By the way, how did you get my private phone number?"
SJG:  "I made up my mind to get it."
FS:  "So you do have willpower, after all."
SJG:  "Sometimes."
FS: "How much have you gained this time?"
SJG: "This time?  You say it like it's a pattern."
FS: "Five pounds up, three pounds down.  Six pounds up, fours pounds down.  It's been this way your whole life."
SJG: "What makes you such an authority?"
FS: "I took notes."