How To Garden, Metaphorically

Grass or weeds? Your guess is as good as mine.

Oh, the garden. The SJG garden, to be exact. A symbol of my life, doncha know. What's that? It's too early for garden-related metaphors? Well, tough tuchus to you and yours. I'm going there. It's the time of atonement, my friends. I'm in a reflective mood in the garden. The SJG garden, to be exact: Just like life, there are brown patches I could do without. There are bright patches of grass, too, so that's nice. At the moment, there's not enough of the nice stuff in my garden. Most of the pretty grass has died off due to the severe water restrictions that seem cruel, yet necessary. But I'll take what I can get. As Rabbi Bim Bim Baum used to tell the young people at shul, a life without restrictions is an invitation to major tsuris.

Moving on with my sermon, what would my garden look like without weeds that look like grass but are actually weeds? I wouldn't know. What are you asking me this? Every life has weeds that threaten to take over. From afar, like an aerial shot from Mars, the weeds look just like grass, I promise you. But it's an illusion, people. Get a little closer and reality hits you like a meteor. Those weeds are bad news. Invasive and evil. And there's no killing them off. Trust me, I've tried. Those deceptive muthas  keep coming back because that's their job. Do your best to avoid them. Do your best to weed them out, even if it's a temporary fix.

Still with me? To review: Brown patches. Bright patches. Weeds. That's life. But wait, I'm forgetting something. What is it? Ah, yes. Flowers. My favorite part of the SJG Garden. Flowers don't last as long as I'd like here in the garden. They die off and get replaced by other flowers that die off and get replaced. The cycle repeats. The gardener returns. The message is clear. Keep going with the flowers even if they don't last long. Keep planting the flowers. They're the best part of any garden, winter, spring, summer or fall. All you have to do is -- oh, please, you get the picture. Now go do something gardeny before it gets too hot. You're welcome.