Yesterday in temple, the presumably nice, if somewhat distracted man who had the privilege of sitting next to me, "accidentally" nudged me with his elbow four times, bumped me with his rolled-up prayer book print-out five times, but who's counting, and nearly knocked me off my chair six times. But other than that, it was a lovely Yom Kippur Service. I entertained many assertive ways to convey my annoyance, but ruled them out. I already had enough things to atone for. Plus, I couldn't relocate. It was SRO in the synagogue. So I turn to you, my favorite advisor. What's the etiquette on the holiest of High Holidays?
Thanks,
Bluish Jewiss
Dear Bluish,
I feel your pain on a deeply spiritual level. If you could've just given him a friendly shove, it might've done wonders. If you could've just turned to him and said, "Excuse me, dude, you're seriously invading my space," he might've gotten the message. If you could've just raised your hand and reported him to the rabbi, it might've soothed your battered soul. Alas, none of these maneuvers would've been proper in a temple setting. But it would've felt so good, am I right? Of course I am. Next time you're faced with such a situation in shul, my best advice is to sigh, louder with each infraction, roll your eyes and remember to practice tolerance, even if it kills you.
You're welcome,
The SJG
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