Eating Champ Crashes Contest

I like the red ones

(Sherman Oaks) Arrested at a pre-July 4th M&M-eating event, the SJG was freed Saturday morning after a night in jail, looking a little bloated. The galactically-known blogger, in a pink T-shirt that said, "Free The SJG!", was released by a Van Nuys judge after she pleaded "not that guilty." A contract dispute had kept the SJG out of Hershey's Annual Pre-4th of July Backyard M&M Eating Contest, but she showed up anyway. "For starters, the event was held in my own eff'n backyard. I was there as a spectator, just to cheer on my competitors," she said, bitterly.


Fans chanted for her, and "in the heat of it, I jumped on the buffet table, hoping they would let me eat a few handfuls of M&M's. I'm particularly fond of the red ones." The SJG's attorney, Mark Dewey, of Dewey, Cheatem & Howe, said his client was waved up onto the table after a few people she paid began chanting, "Let her eat!" Shortly after she got on the table, "she was grabbed from behind by officers," Dewey said. "Where the officers came from, I have no idea. They certainly weren't invited."

The SJG was charged with resisting arrest, trespassing on her own property ("What's up with that?" she asked) and disorderly conduct. She had refused to sign a contract with Major League Noshing, the fressers' equivalent of the NFL. On her very silly blog, she said she wanted to be free to enter noshing contests sanctioned by other groups. But a few days ago, she told the Daily Kvetcher, "I really want to compete in the Sherman Oaks event. Think of all the hostess gifts I'll receive."

Julie "Jaws" Chestnut of Tarzana won by downing 54 "fun size" packs of M&M's (plain) in two minutes. After witnessing the drama involving the SJG, Chestnut said, "I feel bad for her. But not that bad." Chestnut claimed the rainbow colored champion's belt and a $20,000 Prada purse, but was disappointed with her own performance. She was aiming for a record 60 "fun size" packs in one minute. Last year, she ate 59 "fun size" packs, four more than the SJG.