Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Important Holiday Resolutions

This morning, the SJG woke up full of Important Holiday Resolutions and couldn't wait to share them with hubby, as he stood in the kitchen, defrosting from his early walkies with Dusty.  "Can you keep the teeth chattering to a minimum please?  I have things to say."  He shivered in response.  "First, I want to light the candles every night, not just the first night. Eight nights of candle-lighting.  Second, for eight nights, I want to declare this house a no-kvetching zone.  No kvetching for eight nights.  I'm not sure this family of kvetchers can pull it off, but I think we should try.  Third, for eight nights, no swearing.  It's going to be hard, for gosh sakes, but in honor of Hanukkah, we should give it a shot.  Four, we buy tickets to see 'The March of the Toy Dreidel' --"  Here, hubby thawed out enough to interrupt me.  "One problem with your Important Holiday Resolutions."  "What?!" "Hanukkah is over."  "How dare you!"  "We're done with Hanukkah."  "Nah-uh.  If we're done, why is the menorah still sitting on the counter?"  "'Cuz we're too lazy to put it away."  "And by 'we' you mean me?"  "I didn't say that."  "But what you're saying is --" "Hanukkah came and went."  "We only observed one night. What the eff is wrong with us?"  "We don't have little kids anymore," he said, retreating upstairs to exercise, while I reflected on my Important Holiday Resolutions, and vowed to observe them next Hanukkah, if, by some miracle, I can remember them. 


  1. You make me laugh - I'd like to get through breakfast without dropping an F-bomb! xxx

  2. I can't do it! I talked like a drunken sailor.