I Can Hardly Wait

A conversation with my sons:

Eldest: "I don't want you to go anywhere."

Me: "Now? Or forever?"
Eldest: "Now. Stay home."

Youngest: "Don't go to dance, Ma."

Me: "You'll be asleep on the sofa."

Eldest/Youngest: "True."

Me: "I'll be back at 6:15."

Youngest: "Don't go to dance, Ma."

Me: "When I'm old, I won't go to dance."

Eldest: "You'll dance at home."

Me: "I'll dance with my caregiver."

Eldest: "By then, they'll have robot caregivers you can dance with."
Me: "By then, I may be too tired to dance. I'll just watch."

Youngest: "Ti-ti-time for your ene-ene-enema, Mrs. Schnei-schnei-schneider."

Eldest: "Ti-ti-time for your sponge bath, Mr. Schnei-schnei-schneider." 

Me: "Ti-ti-time for your Depends."
Youngest: "Ti-ti-time for your nappy-kins."

Eldest: "We're getting you a robot caregiver."

Youngest: "We are so doing that, Ma."

Me: "That's very generous, boys. I can hardly wait."