Friday, February 25, 2011

Oscar Wear

Blunt Cards: snarky & hilarious
For my cuzzy's intimate Oscar gathering, I'll be wearing my inner-beauty.  Wrapping my heart in Vera Wang, pumping up my soul in Loubutins, detailing my aura in Tiffany. I'm schlepping the finery out of storage, hiring a stylist to bring out my love of humanity, my interior Mother Teresa.  Should the crew from "What Not To Wear" drop by, to trash the personal mishegas I've worked so hard to own; should the fashion police declare me too dated on the inside, too "last season," I promise you, I will bring them down.  You heard it here first, bitches. 
Posted by Carol Starr Schneider at 7:35 AM

7 comments:

  1. AnonymousFebruary 25, 2011 at 7:58 AM

    That's a good card. I hadn't seen that one. I SO want to be on What Not to Wear. A couple of friends have nominated me but I would be a challenge and I think Clinton and Stacy may not be ready for Dr. Crane! (Can't wear polyester for example. I'm allergic!)

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  2. Carol Starr SchneiderFebruary 25, 2011 at 8:31 AM

    So they'll dress you in leather and lace and satin.

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  3. JOHNFebruary 25, 2011 at 9:39 AM

    Back to the Oscars ...I'll be wearing a designer outfit from Marshalls or Ross Dress For Less. Something that begs for attention at our Cousin's Party while eating onion dip.

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  4. Carol Starr SchneiderFebruary 25, 2011 at 11:17 AM

    Clown-wear. Or Mime face. That works.

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  5. JOHNFebruary 25, 2011 at 1:50 PM

    So much for my attempt to surprise on the Red Carpet...

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  6. Cathy HamiltonFebruary 26, 2011 at 8:00 AM

    "Wrapping my heart in Vera Wang...detailing my aura in Tiffany." Poetry!

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  7. Carol Starr SchneiderFebruary 26, 2011 at 8:42 AM

    We aim for the stars.

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