Tuesday, March 27, 2012

This Placenta Is Delish!

"I could use some of that placenta right about now"
It was bad enough that January Jones didn't appear on "Mad Men" Sunday night.  Now this!  She's going around telling folks she's been busy eating her own placenta! If that's not the definition of TMI, what is? Back away from the microphone, Betty.  Stop saying sh*t like this:  "Your placenta gets dehydrated and made into vitamins.  It's something I was very hesitant about, but we're the only mammals who don't ingest our own placentas."  But don't you worry your pretty little heads.  It's not FDA-approved, so you won't be seeing Betty's Placenta Plus on your Costco shelves any time soon.  "It's not witch-crafty or anything," Jones insists.  "I suggest it to all moms."  Had someone suggested "placenta encapsulation" to the SJG, back in the days when I still had my uterus, I'm thinking I would've responded thusly:  "Are you out of your eff'n mind?!" So what if placenta-noshing is a "time-honored cultural practice," not to mention, "nutrient-rich and a source of hormones"?  I could've lived my entire life without this info.  And now I won't be able to look at Betty No-Longer-Draper without thinking, "Hmmm, I wonder if she's had her placenta today."  This sort of over-sharing needs to end, wouldn't you agree?  Of course you do!

5 comments:

  1. Delicious with a little Cianti...

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  2. Takes me back to my first Bradley Method training course in a cozy Venice bungalow when we were expecting Patrick nearly 30 years ago. The instructor extolled the virtues of freezing the placenta and storing it. She then left the room and returned with her proudest possession... fortunately she chose not to pass it around... very tough to get me to attend the second session.

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  3. Boogers, scabs, ear wax, placenta. So many wonderful choices on the Body Buffet. Keep your breath spray handy though-- nothing turns people off more quickly than placenta breath.

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