Double Ding Dong. Double knock. It's noon and someone's at my door. Dusty barks over the noise. I go investigate. There's a young man, eyes popping out, nose pressed against the glass. Instant transformation into uber-distrustful SJG. "What?" I yell, over the barking. "I'm not a crazy person," he yells back. This is not the way to score points with me, or gain my trust. Only a crazy person would announce he's not a crazy person. On my end, no response. The not-crazy crazy person continues, but I can barely hear him over the barkity-bark-bark. "Something... something. I don't have Triple A!" If this is meant to get me to open the door, it's not working. "Sorry!" I yell. Why am I apologizing? Bad habit. The not-crazy crazy person goes back down the driveway. I keep an eye on him. Dusty keeps a bark on him. I see his car and the hood open and someone more trusting, a dude, gives him a jump, and two seconds later, he's gone. Byeeeee! I'm so happy now! And yet, so deeply disturbed. Has there ever been a time when I trusted anyone who showed up randomly at the door? Young people seeking signatures for good causes? Jehovah's Witnesses? No. Other than Girl Scouts, who don't go door to door, anymore, I've always been 100 percent distrustful. And not nice. Not nice, at all. I'm rude, I'm bitchy, I'm mean. Sorry! Ring my door. Welcome to the Dark Side, SJG edition. Don't say I didn't warn you. Now, go away.
Last year I finally put a sticker above my doorbell in thick red ink saying "No Solisiting!" and it has actually (so far) stopped the door bell stranger drop bys! Wait there's my doorbell gotta go...
ReplyDeleteOK, why don't you just lay down on that nice sofa over there and we can talk about these anger issues... do you have the same reaction to unsolicitated internet posts and spam? Do you feel better by being mean to the real-world interrupters? Could you envision a moment when you could just say, "No, thankee." and simply walk away from the door using the moment to calmly pet Dusty? There you go, back in your body ready to resume that blog posting on the benefits of Yoga and blissful contemplation... you're welcome.
ReplyDeleteall wonderful suggestions. "no thankee" to someone asking for a help doesn't sound like the write response, stevie. "go away" is better and more zen-like.
ReplyDeleteThe fact is the civilized world is not. Sadly, you'd be an idiot to ever open your door to a stranger.
ReplyDeleteTrue that!
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ReplyDelete