The SJG Mental Disposal Service

Ever have one of those days when you just can't get rid of your negative, soul-depleting, why-don't-you-choose-someone-else-for-a-change kind of crappy-ass thinking?  Ever have one of those days when you'd like to unload all that psychological baggage you've been schlepping around on somebody else?  Well, look no further, my friends.  Here at the SJG Mental Disposal Service of Sherman Oaks, we're all about quality service.  Need to rent a dumpster for all your pent-up rage?  Get in line.  Or call us, instead. We believe you deserve nothing less than the best service possible. We'll give you what you need, what you didn't realize you need and what you don't need but might need at a later date.  All at a good price, promise.  We'll praise you for finally letting go of that heavy load of mishegas that keeps you up at night.  Give yourself a break.  We'll show you how to turn your grief green and keep your mind relatively clean. Why store all those dumb neuroses in your crowded keppy?  Why pass your issues down when you can recycle them into something better for the planet? Like what, you ask?  That's for us to know and not burden you with, because you've got enough on your plate.  Our goal is to empty out the clutter in your personal head space. Enough already. It's weighing you down. Kiss it goodbye.  Sure, the SJG Mental Disposal Service might not be a big company, but we'll console you and serve you a nice warm slice of kugel, made just for you, and what big company is going to do that?  We take great pride in what we do.  We're here for you.  So give us a call and let go of that bulky childhood trauma, that hazardous camp experience when the horse ran off with you, drop-off all your worries and let us deal with the repercussions.  Go, have a lovely life. Isn't it about time?