Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Smart Women, Foolish Paint

Finding the Right Colors, Avoiding the Wrong Ones
Carol is in her early 50s, or so she likes to tell people, married, an unemployed, award-winning TV writer, but then, isn't everyone in this town?  She finds most paint attractive, until she buys a sample quart and brings it home.  The lid comes off, and immediately, she feels let down.  "WTF?" she's been known to say, ad nauseum. The actual paint color looks nothing at all like it did in the freakin' picture.  Once again, the disconnect leaves her unfulfilled.  Once again, the SJG has made foolish choices in paint.  "I always seem to end up with the wrong eff'n paint," she kvetches.  "If there's a loser in a paint store full of lotto winners, trust me, I'll find it and bring it home, cook it a nice hot meal, and wind up disappointed."  The more intelligent and sophisticated the woman, the more self-defeating and lame-ass her choices and patterns of selecting paint, especially when it comes to flat exteriors.  The SJG needs a little self-help, a little mazel, a paint color that matches her high expectations.  Good luck with that, SJG.  Let us know how that goes.

8 comments:

  1. OK, first of all, if it looks like baby sh*t, don't use it. people will drive by and say, "OMG that house looks like baby sh*t"

    MC

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  2. Good advice. Baby ka-ka: bad choice. We're also very concerned about the band-aid look. As in, "OMB that house looks like an eff'n band-aid."

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  3. There's a house in my area that everyone refers to as "The Pepto Bismo House". Guess what ugly shade of Pink it is painted? Stay away from Pink!!

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  4. I LOVE a dark olive with white trim. My husband doesn't like that. I also love a dark blue with white trim. My husband doesn't. It's so crisp looking to me. You can also paint a rather plain color but do a red door or something like that.

    But I think you're obsessed and it's showing. People are starting to point and whisper.

    MC

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  5. Obsessed? That's my middle name. One of them.

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  6. I have several middle names as well. Same parents?

    mc

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