Saturday, July 30, 2011

Bagel Thief On The Loose

Could it be?
"Police."  "Hi, this is the Short Jewish Gal."  "So?"  "I'd like to report a bagel burglary."  "A what?"  "Someone stole a bagel off the counter.  I was getting ready to toast it for my youngest son."  "How old is your son, ma'am?"  "19."  "19, and he can't toast a bagel for himself?"  "He's not fully domesticated and that's beside the point.  Someone stole a bagel right off the counter and vanished out the back door." "Can you describe the bagel?  Was it onion? Raisin? Sesame?  One of those 'everything' bagels, with garlic and God-knows-what?" "Nothing fancy.  Just a plain egg bagel."  "By any chance, was the thief in question your son?"  "Why would my son steal his own bagel?"  "You just said he wasn't domesticated, ma'am.  Maybe he doesn't know any better."  "He knows what he likes. He likes a nice toasted bagel."  "He's got good taste.  Anyone who eats an untoasted bagel is an animal." "I agree with you, officer."  "So, you want us to send out a unit?"  "That'd be great"  "What's your address?"  "Just look for the house in Sherman Oaks with the huge neon sign that says, 'Home of the Short Jewish Gal.'"  "Fair enough.  Any bagels left over?  I could use a nosh."  "If I had any bagels, would I be calling you?  The thief took the last one."


  1. Who's a good Dusty? Who's a good boy?

    Drop that Bagel! Bad Dusty! Oh Dusty ...

  2. Move over Houdini.........Dusty "magic" is in the house.

  3. Dusty wants to bring Scout a bagel as a gift.