Tuesday, April 19, 2016

The People Avoider

An example of avoidance

One day, maybe not that far off, the world will be run by one giant multi-purpose app.  Do I look forward to that day?  Not so much. But there is one app I'd like to buy from the App Store today:  the People Avoider App. All you'd have to do is enter the names of the various people you'd like to avoid for the rest of your life.  Come on, we've all got a few of those contacts we'd like to permanently delete. Just yesterday, I saw a woman I actually sued.  I'm not a litigious type, believe me.  This is the only person I've ever sued, and at least once or twice a year, I see her somewhere.  "Oh bleep," I whispered to my friend Zelda, "there she is again." "Who?" "You know who."  "Oh, we hate her."  "Yes, we do." The last time Zelda and I met at the same restaurant, we saw someone she didn't want to see.  Someone who had threatened to sue her.

There must be a better way to avoid you.

But imagine if we had the People Avoider App at our fingertips. We'd never have to see these people again. The People Avoider App would locate them and forewarn us. I see no drawbacks to such a joyous app, other than a serious weeding out of all the places you like to go on any given day. "Oh, bleep!  I can't go to CVS for my Extra-Strength Tolerance refill. So-and-so is there."  "Oh, bleep!  I can't go to the movie theater on Ventura. So-and-so is there, and he's sitting in the seat I wanted." So you'll see the movie another time. You'll eat at a different restaurant.  Better to avoid than get aggravated. That's the SJG way.

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