Monday, December 19, 2016

I'm Dreaming...

Dear SJG,
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas, or maybe a green one, which would be better for the environment. And yet, based on what's going on in my backyard, I'm pretty sure it's going to be muddy one. It's nothing but damp dirt, torn up grass and trampled landscaping. I'm looking for someone to blame. Any thoughts?
Thank you,
Backyard Blamer

Dear Blamer,
I'm thinking the Professional Squirrel Chaser may have something to do with the sad state of your yard. The way he runs back and forth, stirring up trouble, would explain the disaster zone that once qualified for a nice spread in House and Garden. If I were you, I'd sit that doggy down and give him a good talking-to. He may not understand a thing you say, but at least you will have tried, and in this very trying world, that should count for something.
You're Welcome,

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