Wednesday, June 1, 2011

High Efficiency Doggy

Dusty has such a busy day, what with the napping, the rolling over, the counter surfing, the nonstop snack demands, that he decided he needed an energy efficiency boast to keep up with his spunky self.  Rather than a nice vitamin supp or a shot of caffeine, he opted for a taste of Tide HE Liquid Laundry Detergent.  I found the measuring cup on the carpet in the living room.  Traces of gooey blue.  The telltale streaks of canine tongue.  This is one sneaky-ass pup.  When he grabbed it from the washing machine and made off like a thief, I can't say; he wouldn't fess up to the crime.  The investigation lasted two seconds and revealed bupkis.  "Did you take this?" I asked.  Dusty rolled his eyes and yawned.  This morning, I expected blue foam bubbling out of his mouth, blue pee, blue poop, but I'm happy to report, we got none of that.  It wasn't like the time he ate a bar of soap and I rushed him to the vet.  As for his level of energy efficiency? Peppy and well-organized.  He lined his toys up neatly by his water dish.  Self-medication, canine-style.  I better keep him away from the Bounce.
Posted by Carol Starr Schneider at 8:06 AM

4 comments:

  1. Einstein DeGeneresJune 1, 2011 at 8:27 AM

    My dog ate a book once. John Grisham. Hardcover, but he didn't eat the cover.

    When I found out I said, "You are SOOOO lucky that you didn't eat the Harry Potter books!" My husband kept asking him for a book report.

    The next day he (the dog, not the husband) pooped little rolled up pieces of printed paper. Actually rather decorative... for something. I have NO idea how they got rolled up. Quite fascinating.

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  2. AnonymousJune 1, 2011 at 9:09 AM

    Our dog Buckwheat has a tissue paper fetish. Makes for interesting poopies.

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  3. JOHNJune 1, 2011 at 9:35 AM

    My favorite Dusty food story is when he lept up and swiped a large portion of a chocolate cake from the kitchen counter. You realized that I had seen what Dusty did & were forced to cut away all the area around where Dusty's paw print remained. I've always presumed that if you hadn't had guests over who saw Dusty in the act you would have just shrugged it off and served the cake "as is".

    Fess up. I'm right, right?

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  4. Carol Starr SchneiderJune 1, 2011 at 10:16 AM

    I'm loving the comments today. Seattle Marge: I have a literary dog, too. He ate "A Dive From Clausen's Pier." Nothing decorative came out, however, but he wrote a nice review. Dusty loves tissue paper, paper towels, dish towels. And bro', I think it was lemon pound cake he stole. Everything is served "as is." He always washes dishes without being told, unlike other family members.

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