A Letter From The Queen

"I am not amused."

Dear Short Jewish Gal,

It has come to my royal attention that you recently wrote an erroneous blog full of falsehoods, nonsense and utter poppycock. You made the preposterous assumption that Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of Bupkis, is remarrying Prince Andrew, the Duke of Ongoing Aggravation -- an event that shall happen over my dead body. I therefore command you to retract your fakakta claim, or I shall pursue a lengthy public flogging of your short and silly personage, and perhaps a beheading, as well, depending on my mood, which wavers daily from dark and gloomy to downright testy.
Royally yours,
Elizabeth R

She Who Must Be Obeyed

Your Majesty,

In hopes of keeping my beloved keppy firmly planted on my dainty shoulders, I would like to apologize, profusely, for upsetting you. I meant no harm. I am but a humble blogger. I am not worthy. That said, excellent usage of bupkis and fakata, your highness. I'm so glad to see the Yiddish lessons are paying off. I plan to be in your neighborhood this summer. What say I pop round for tea? There are some wonderful insults I could teach you. You never know when they might come in handy.
Begging forgiveness,
I remain, the SJG
P.S. Hugs to you and the whole royal mishpocha,