Thursday, September 1, 2011

Beauty Tips

How To Age Gracefully Like The SJG:
1.  Hire body double for all important public appearances
2.  A spritz of Clorox gets out those stubborn age spots
3.  Daily schmear of mayo under makeup
4.  Never frown, smile or react on any level
5.  A hint of Spackle works miracles
6.  Denial
7.  Apres bath, douse body in olive oil
8.  Keep away from open flame
9.  New mantra:  I don't give a sh*t
10. Burn all photos of self after age of 15
Posted by Carol Starr Schneider at 8:03 AM

5 comments:

  1. JOHNSeptember 1, 2011 at 8:36 AM

    I'm stealing your new Mantra!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Carol Starr SchneiderSeptember 1, 2011 at 9:37 AM

    I expect a small royalty payment.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Steve LantzSeptember 1, 2011 at 12:49 PM

    Payable in commodities: olive oil, mayo, spackle, Clorox, preferably a CBOE futures contract traded under the symbol IDGAS

    ReplyDelete
  4. Carol Starr SchneiderSeptember 1, 2011 at 3:26 PM

    I love to share the wealth.

    ReplyDelete
  5. mickSeptember 1, 2011 at 8:32 PM

    I 'm thinking I'll burn all photos before age 50. No point in sharing what's been lost!

    ReplyDelete

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