Shyness: A Powerful Thing

Lately, Time Magazine is my source of all things SJG.  A few months back, Time reminded me of the joys of Anxiety.  A life-long nervous wreck, I'd forgotten how much fun it could be to worry myself sick.  And now, Time tells me that Shyness, another life-long issue, is Important and Powerful.  Woo-hoo!  Who knew?  Turns out, I've got lots in common with folks like Gandhi, Moses ("Let my people go -- so I can be alone, which is what I prefer"), Bill Gates, personal fav Hillary Clinton, and Mother Teresa!  Man, am I in good company.  My earliest memories are of me sitting in the classroom, too shy to say anything and praying I'm not called on to answer a question.  No surprise, Anxiety and Shyness are clever co-dependents; a tag team of tsouris-makers. And yet, if you had the pleasure of meeting me now, you wouldn't peg me as shy.  At my 20th high school reunion, I had no problem going up to people who didn't remember me and saying, "Hi, how ya doin'?"  I had no trouble dancing like a lunatic, standard procedure any time music kicks in, to the point where a gal who's known me since Warner Avenue days said, "Wow, someone's come out of her shell!"  Trust me, it wasn't easy.  It's all about the behavior modification.  I just kept forcing myself into situations that terrified me.  It's been one long social experiment, with varying results.  At this point, I'm a combo platter.  I'm one from Column A, one from Column B.  There are still things that bring out the SJG shyness.  Public speaking.  Big groups of people I don't know.  I'll never be as outgoing as Muhammad Ali.  I'll never be the uber-shy gal I was way back when.  I'm an in-betweener.  Part introvert.  Part extrovert.  Part Hillary Clinton.  Part Marie Antoinette.  But Time Magazine tells me I'm okay the way I am, and that's good enough for me.