Wednesday, April 2, 2014

It's Never Too Late To Kick Up Your Heels

Joan Pierce and personal dance guru Doug Rivera
In honor of my new role model, Winnie of the Fishnet Stockings, I tried to demonstrate her signature moves in dance class last night for Joan, my former role model.  Winnie and Joan are in the same octogenarian mindset of "I'll do whatever I want, I made it this far." I'd like to stress, however,  that Joan, a glamorous actress, is a much classier version of Santa Fe-based Winnie.  If only I'd taken a photo of Winnie, mid-interpretative dance, I could show you what I mean, but then this blog would spill over into a type of pornographic terrain I try to avoid, after the last warning I got from the nice folks in charge of my personal blogosphere.  The shaming went something like this:

 "Dear SJG, that last post featuring your bare ass made us rather uncomfortable.  Please refrain from posting future naked shots of yourself, or anyone else, or we'll have to shut you down, thereby disappointing your ginormous worldwide readership.  Love, Blogger."
The tush shot:  My parents had this photo 
blown up in honor of my 40th.
The fact that the photo in question happened to be a baby pic of the SJG was beside the point.  So, no, I'm not showing you Winnie's ho-ha*-revealing leg lift (*first time usage of ho-ha, a term I stole from Cathy without asking her permission).  But this will give you an idea of how limber Winnie is:
Not Winnie, but this is the exact move I'm still milking 
I'm afraid today's post has gotten off course. What the ho-ha did I want to tell you today? Aw, yes.  Last night, I copied the first portion of Winnie's spontaneous Ode to Spring right down to the arm flailing. And then I got to the crazy leg extension and couldn't lift mine past my hip bone. Joan gave my re-creation a thumbs down. "That's it?" "Sorry, Joanie, that's as far as I can go, but you get the general idea." "Not really," she said.  "You're just mad that I found a new role model." "Actually, I'm okay with it. All those daily phone calls were starting to get on my nerves." "But Joanie, I thought you liked my phone calls." "I was just pretending." Hmm.  I wonder if Winnie's number is listed.

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