Friday, November 14, 2014

Keep On Kvetchin'

(Sherman Oaks) She did it! After 34 hours, the Short Jewish Gal now holds the Manischewitz World Record for longest uninterrupted live kvetch report. We caught up with her at her palatial home to see how she was faring after all that kvetching. "To be honest, I've been better. My feet hurt, my mouth is tired, and I could use a nap. I haven't slept through the night in 56 years. And don't even get me started on my back. It aches like nobody's business. Kvetching for 34 hours was the easy part. I've got a litany of endless complaints. Physical, emotional, professional. Pick 10 neuroses from Column A, 10 from Column B. I could probably go another 34 hours, but my throat is hoarse from moaning." Asked why she launched her personal kvetch-a-thon in the first place, the SJG said, "I won't lie, I wanted some attention. I figured, why not focus on me for a change, instead of everybody else and all their issues? Kvetching is what I do best. It's the gift that keeps on giving. I wanted to share it with the world, maybe get a National SJG Kvetch Day going on the 2015 Calendar. I know, I'm probably too late. Maybe 2016. It's something to strive for. In the meantime, I'll keep on kvetchin.'"

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