Sunday, July 3, 2016

Thirteen Discoveries of Old Age


1. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.
2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and bran flakes.
3. I finally got my head together. Unfortunately, now my body is falling apart.
4. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.
5. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.
6. If all is not lost, where is it?
7. It’s easier to get older than to get wiser.
8. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
9. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.
10. It's not hard to meet expenses--they're everywhere.
11. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
12. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter. I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I’m hereafter.
13. I am unable to remember if I emailed this to you before.

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