Saturday, June 6, 2015
Happy Teeth
Dear SJG,
Your friends at Happy Teeth would like to thank you for letting us take care of your dental needs. We hope you enjoyed getting your teeth cleaned yesterday with one of our many talented hygienists. Next visit, we're getting those X-rays, whether you like it or not. We want you to know we'll be there for all your dental emergencies as you get older and everyone you know starts backing away, in horror, aware that you're certainly not the looker you once were. Your close personal friends at Happy Teeth don't care how ugly you get. We'll take care of you and make you presentable again.
When your teeth loosen and fall out at inappropriate times, who loves you, baby? Happy Teeth. When your gums give out, we promise not to laugh, like the other people in your life. We'll fit you in, even if we have no appointments. That's how important you are to us. When you lose your dentures in the bagel bin at Gelson's, we'll make you another pair, for free. Just kidding. We're not that generous. We'll charge you, but we'll be fair. Let's face it. Your close personal friends at Happy Teeth care more about your well-being than anyone else in your life. We hope that one day, you'll leave us all your money, if we haven't taken it all already. Dental care is expensive. So please, SJG, remember this: no one loves you like we do. No one.
Dentally yours,
The Nice People at Happy Teeth
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