The Honor Is All Mine

It's true. Any time something extraordinary happens to a Jew, the worldwide community kvells. This is especially true in my adopted hometown of Sherman Oaks, where the following story made headlines yesterday: "She's done it again, bitches. The Short Jewish Gal has been named The Kvetchiest Woman Alive for the second time by Oy! Magazine." I know, I know. The honor took me by surprise, too. The first time it happened, I expected it. But the second time? It feels like bragging. Plus, I've already carried the mantle of Kvetchiest Woman Alive for an entire year. And now, I have to do it again? I'm exhausted just thinking about it. The tight gowns, the stilettos, the public appearances and ribbon cuttings that go along with the title? I'm not sure I have it in me. Can't they choose somebody else for a change? I can't be the only kvetch out there. Not that I'm ungrateful. It's nice to get recognized for something. Even this. So I'd like to thank Oy! for giving me a shout-out, yet again, and for embracing my love of complaining. It's a lifestyle. It's a choice. It's the SJG way.