Winter Olympics To Debut Co-Ed Kvetching Event

(Sherman Oaks, CA) – The exciting sport of Competitive Co-Ed Winter Kvetching will finally make its debut at the 2018 Winter Olympic Games, and it's the first time male and female kvetchers will compete, Olympically, against each other. Just how cold is it in PyeongChang, South Korea? We're about to find out. According to the Short Jewish Gal, president of USA Competitive Kvetching, the 16 American men and women who have qualified for this first-ever Winter Olympic event are all outstanding kvetchers, proud to represent their sport and country in a first-class fashion. "In preparation, they've dedicated endless hours in overly-air conditioned restaurants without even a sweater to protect them. They've slept in ice rinks. They've schlepped down ski slopes in nothing but their long johns. They've snowboarded in their birthday suits. They've curled back and forth in meat lockers. Even more impressive, they've perfected their whining, grumbling, moaning and extreme shivering, while alienating family, friends and co-workers. Pretty much no one is talking to them, or rooting for them, at this point. It's one thing to kvetch. It's another thing to kvetch in winter while turning blue and facing frost bite. There's an art to it."

The SJG went on to say, "You may think men and women kvetch differently, but in this area, we're 100 percent equal. We kvetch about the same things, with varying degrees of anger, resignation and bitterness, which explains the three areas the Olympic Winter Kvetchers can medal in. All I can say is good luck, may you not break any bones, kina hora, poo poo poo, and may you kvetch big for America, because God knows, America has plenty to kvetch about it these days."

"Oy, can you say brain freeze?"