Gimme A Kiss

Kiss or I'll shoot!

There's nothing better than a good shoot 'em up to distract the SJG from writing.  After a leisurely lunch, served to us by Hans, my private butler, co-scripter Kelly and I were just about to do a heap of collaborating, when an online story diverted us.  Let's just say we went a little "Street Car Named Desire," reenacting the little drama that played out in Kelly's home state.  Her Southern accent puts mine to shame.  But then, she can't speak a lick of Yiddish, so we're even. 

If there's anything funnier than a nearly-fatal attraction, I'd like to hear it:  "92-year-old Helen Staudinger of Florida has been accused of shooting the front of her neighbor's house after he refused to give her a smooch. Police in Marion County, Florida say that she also shot his car. In an interview, the man explains, 'She said, 'Well I'm not leaving without a kiss.' And I said, 'Well I've got a girlfriend, so I'm not gonna give you no kiss.' The victim, Dwight Bettner, says the neighbor 'raised hell,' but he never expected her to return with a gun." 

Kelly and I spent the next hour or so trying to work "so I'm not gonna give you no kiss" into our soon-to-be, highly-sought-after animated script -- assuming we ever finish it.  But inserting a shooting spree into a kid-friendly, frog-centric tale turned out to be harder than either one of us expected.  Don't worry, we'll keep at it, for days, weeks, whatever it takes.  We will force that eff'n line into our script if it's the last thing we do.  Killing time?  How dare you.  This is our process.  What's yours?