Dear NYC

Hey, NYC:  None of this while I'm there

Dear New York City,
Hi, it's me again.  The SJG.  Last year, right around this time, we had a long talk about the weather, and you completely ignored my requests.  I'm still a little resentful, but even so, I thought I'd give it another try before I arrive in your city that never sleeps and never removes scaffolding.  I notice you're raining today.  That's okay.  The eldest is visiting you and he's not bothered by such inconvenience.  He thinks the rain is cool.  I beg to differ.  I don't think the rain is cool when I'm visiting you.  Precipatation makes for a soggy, cranky SJG.  So, NYC, please, for once, would you just listen to me?  I give so much, and ask for so little. I don't need a parade down Broadway to welcome me.  I understand that's hard to coordinate.  I don't need your permission to get up on stage and dance.  I'm doing it with or without your blessing.  All I need is five days, rain-free.  Five freakin' days.  Can you do that for me, NYC?  Can you put your own selfish needs aside, just once?  What must I do to make this happen?  Is some sort of payment involved?  Do you take VISA, Amercian Express, the SJG Gold Card?  Just tell me, NYC.  Must I pay in full or can we do this monthly?  What sort of interest are we talking?  Come on, NYC.  Don't be chintzy with the info.  You've got two weeks to get your sh*t together.  I anxiously await your reply.
Hugs,
the SJG