How To Be A Jewish Son

On this day, when some will wear sombreros, and some will drink sombrero-sized margaritas, I find myself obsessing, not about guacamole and chips, but about... David Steinberg, a nice Jewish Canadian comic-mensch. Why am I obsessing about David Steinberg and not planning a last-minute Cinco de Mayo bash? Because I've never thrown a Cinco de Mayo bash and don't plan to start now. But if you'd like to invite me to yours, I'd be happy to attend for a fee. For personal appearances, I charge two bagels an hour, plus lox. But back to David Steinberg and the point of today's blog, which clearly, I've forgotten. Wait, it's coming to me. So last night, in an effort to find something that didn't remind me about the current state of the world, I went searching on Amazon Prime and found a David Susskind talk show from 1970: "How To Be A Jewish Son." Guests include Mel Brooks, smoking up a storm, David Steinberg, so cute at 28, and George Segal, puffing on a cigar. Other guests: Stan Herman (fashion designer), Dan Greenburg ("How To Be A Jewish Mother") and Larry Goldberg (the late New York pizza baron).

When the show first aired, it was called vile, vulgar and disgraceful. But now, of course, it's considered a classic and plenty hilarious, capturing these men very early in their careers. Mel Brooks is two-pictures in ("The Producers" and "The Twelve Chairs"). George Segal has just starred in "Where's Poppa," David Steinberg is single and loving it, and Dan Greenburg is married to Nora Ephron, a union that ends in 1976. They share some standard cliches about Jewish mothers being overprotective and food-centric. Dan Greenburg says his mother made him eat everything on his plate and everyone else's in the restaurant to make sure nothing went to waste. David Steinberg says his mother was the designated hitter, spanking and slapping him for every infraction, while his father the Rabbi simply accepted him for what he was - "a punishment from God." Mel Brooks has nothing but good things to say about his short, gutsy Russian mama, but acknowledges it took her a while to warm up to his nice Catholic wife Annie (Bancroft.)  Like Mel Brooks, George Segal lost his father when he was young and seems reluctant to say anything negative about his mother.

This morning, I googled all of them, but mostly David Steinberg, the only one I had an adolescent crush on. In honor of Cinco de Mayo, look what I found.